Deep Emotion vs. SENTIMENTALITY, Walking a Fine Line

Sentimentality is the only sentiment that rubs you the wrong way.-Author: W. Somerset Maugham

Have you ever read a particular scene in fiction and had the opposite reaction from what the author intended? Has a description of a “tall, dark and handsome,” hero who left “butterflies,” in the heroine’s stomach ever made you roll your eyes? Have you ever closed a book during a passage of supposed-to-be spine-chilling tension? Has a rift between characters spurred you to furrow your brow and mutter, “What’s their deal?” Did an emotionally-traumatizing experience for a main character ever leave you indifferent to their plight? Has a pun ever left you sarcastically saying, “ha ha”? This is sentimentality.

And it’s terrifying. Isn’t it? Just thinking about this makes me want to pull up my book document and revise.

Sentimentality occurs when emotions such as rage, humor, passion, terror, sadness and despair feel forced. Such emotions come off as artificial on the page. It happens when clichés reign over descriptions, when emotions are stated rather than shown. Readers read about a character’s particular emotion but they don’t feel a thing themselves. In other words, sentimentality elicits a gag reflex in readers instead of a sigh. Are you authors scared yet? I am!

Emotions are powerful in fiction, don't you think? At least they can be. “Preparing fiction…without emotion results in telling rather than showing,” says author Vivian Gilbert Zabel (Article Source).
Without emotion, literature feels stripped of the “good stuff.” In other words, sentiment is a good thing; sentimentality isn’t.

Sentimentality happens when writers present only the surface emotions attached to a given emotive scene. Many blogs and other websites offering writing tips suggest that we watch for cliches as a source of sentimentality. Characters “clench fists” in the face of confrontation, feel their “heart pounding” under the cloud of terror, and their “stomach sink” at every whisper of bad news. Should we avoid these emotions altogether? No!

Unfortunately, it seems that many writers go above and beyond trying to avoid sentimentality, neglecting sentiment altogether. This is sad. While it can be scary to put our personal emotional take on the world and its complexities in print, I think it’s best to march out onto the tight wire, walking the fine line of deep emotional resonance without falling off into
sentimentality (had to tie the picture in somehow).

So, what do we do when our novels have some weighty and emotional material? How can we make our writing resonate emotionally without crossing the line into sentimentality?

Dianna Dorisi-Winget in "Let's Get Physical! Writing Emotion in Fiction" advises, “since emotions are such an integral part of the human condition, fiction writers must employ description that accurately expresses a character's feelings. However, simplistic and overused descriptions leave the reader unmoved. Using clichés (simplistic and overused words or phrases) results in sentimentality.” (Article Source)

Authors can avoid sentimentality without losing emotion needed to reach readers. The writer simply has to deal with the emotion in an original and complex manner by trying to avoid abstract words and ideas. This is accomplished by staying with concrete descriptions…Abstract words and ideas can be interpreted by others in different ways, relying on the readers' definition. Details are required to make the emotion live. (Article Source)

What are your thoughts on sentimentality? I want to know! Does it bug you as a reader? Does it scare you as a writer? Where do you think the line between deep emotion and sentimentality should be drawn? Please share.

(Photo Source: Philippe Petit, "The Man on Wire")

3rd Annual LDS Writer Blogfest!

I am excited to be taking part in the 3rd Annual LDS Writer Blogfest today. Thank you Kayeleen for inviting me! Each participant (links below) has been asked to highlight a talk from the
LDS General Conference that was held March 31 and April 1. Several talks stood out to me, and many had a deep impact. For this reason, I will highlight a few of the talks that deal with a topic that is constantly on my mind.


President Thomas S. Monson, prophet and president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints said in his talk The Race of Life, "Everywhere people are in a hurry...In this fast-paced life, do we ever pause for moments of meditation—even thoughts of timeless truths?

Said the Savior:
“Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: “But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”

I want to focus on the importance of families, a topic heavily emphasized in conference. "In family relationships love is really spelled T.I.M.E." - Dieter F. Uchtdorf.

In his talk That the Lost May be Found Elder M. Russell Ballard of the quorum of the twelve apostles said that “Societies at large are strengthened as families grow stronger. Commitments to family and values are the basic cause. So what can we do to not become lost? First, may I suggest that we prioritize. Put everything you do outside the home in subjection to and in support of what happens inside your home. Remember President Harold B. Lee’s counsel that “the most important … work you will ever do will be within the walls of your own homes” and President David O. McKay’s timeless “No other success can compensate for failure in the home”

I believe this. My dad did many amazing things. He was successful in athletics and his career. Many people knew him. Awards and recognition followed many of his efforts. Seven years ago he passed away and sadly, people don’t mention him as much as they did when he was alive and soon after he passed. A lot of people have forgotten about him. But I will never forget.

What is a priority? It is so very easy to make to-do lists, write out our goals, or even think about what matters most to us. But are we really prioritizing? A good test I have for myself is to ask the question, “Where am I spending the most of my time?” That can be a scary question to ask because I believe the answer to that question is invariably our first prioity. I believe our priorities are determined by where we choose to place our thoughts, desires and actions. Yikes!

Elder Boyd K. Packer gave a talk titled And a Little Child Shall Lead Them in which he said, “One of the great discoveries of parenthood is that we learn far more about what really matters from our children than we ever did from our parents. We come to recognize the truth in Isaiah’s prophecy that “a little child shall lead them.”

Family time is sacred time and should be protected and respected."

I have learned so much from my children. Being their mom is my greatest blessing and responsibility. Limiting television, Internet, and other distractions can be a challenge, but it’s worth it. Going for a walk, playing at the park or getting down on their level to play My Little Ponies makes all the difference to these little kiddos! This is something I continually need and want to work on: putting my children first!




Check out these other bloggers participating in the
LDS Writer Blogfest:
Amanda Sowards
Angie Lofthouse
Ben Spendlove
Brittany Larsen
Cami Checketts
Charity Bradford
Danyelle Ferguson
Giselle Abreu
Julie Keanini
Julie Coulter Bellon
Kasey Tross
Kayeleen Hamblin
Kelly Bryson
Krista Van Dolzer
Melanie Standford
Rachelle Christensen
Rebecca Belliston
Sierra Gardner
Stephanie Worlton

Larger-Than-Life Characters

Larger-than-life characters conquer the impossible within the world of your novel.


I was viewing various Mormon Messages in preparation for a
talk I’m giving to a group of LDS youth, and I stumbled upon this story. In
addition to evoking a tear, this short clip had me thinking about
larger-than-life characters. Isn't this kid awesome?!



Spencer Zimmerman, to me, is a real life example of a larger-than-life character here. During a time of life when peer acceptance is so critical and it is easier to be self-centered than selfless, Spencer focused on others around him who needed his friendship. His actions are larger-than-life because they are in opposition to what typical teenagers would have done.


I love characters. Character, plot and voice are perhaps three of the top key components of a good story for me. For the most part, novels who tell the stories of larger-than-life characters are the ones we’re drawn to, right?

“In life and in fiction, when people act in ways that are unusual, unexpected, dramatic, decisive, full of consequence and are irreversible, we remember them and talk about them for years.” – Donald Maass Writing the Breakout Novel

Larger-than-life characters are complex. “Three-dimensional.” They have strengths, weaknesses, conflict, goals, deep thoughts, self-awareness and a dose of humor doesn’t hurt. Larger-than-life characters conquer the impossible within the world of the novel.

Have you ever thought back on an experience and wished you’d
have acted differently? Have you ever failed to seize an opportunity? Ever
wished you had said something else, something life-changing that would have
helped someone and now the opportunity is lost? Or, on the flip side, have you
ever thought of the perfect come back after an argument is over? A perfect line
that would have had your friends laughing out loud? Ever wished you’d have
taken the higher road?
Well, at least your characters don’t have to, at least by the story's end. Authors have time to think out the perfect snippet of dialogue and contemplate their character's decisions.
One easy way to make characters larger-than-life is to have them conquer their weaknesses. Is a character painfully shy? Let them take charge and speak up. Is a character egotistic?
Try humbling them. Do they let others take advantage of them? Give them some backbone. Are they held captive and can't see a way out? Let them fight for freedom. Do they have goals they’ve been striving for but can’t accomplish? Give them the determination to clear every hurdle in their path and reach the finish line.
photo credit